The Burglar Who Traded Ted Williams Read online




  THE BURGLAR WHO TRADED TED WILLIAMS

  LAWRENCE

  BLOCK

  This one’s for all the people who’ve come up to me over the past ten years to ask me if I was ever going to write another book about Bernie. If half of you buy it, I’ll be rich.

  It’s also for Sue Grafton, a very classy lady indeed. And for Steve King, who wanted a book about cats.

  And it’s for Lynne. You want to know a secret? They’re all for Lynne….

  Contents

  ONE

  “Not a bad-looking Burglar,” he said. “I don’t suppose you’d…

  TWO

  “According to Oscar Wilde,” I told Carolyn, “a cynic is…

  THREE

  “The rent’s only part of it,” I said. “There’s more…

  FOUR

  The elevator huffed and puffed getting me to the ninth…

  FIVE

  You’re not here, I told the dead guy. You’re a…

  SIX

  Look, it wasn’t my idea.

  SEVEN

  Well, it seemed to be working out. I’d had plenty…

  EIGHT

  Trade picked up as the afternoon wore on, with a…

  NINE

  “Before I forget,” Wally Hemphill said, “I called your therapist.

  TEN

  I could have gone straight to the store and opened…

  ELEVEN

  “In 1950,” I told Carolyn, “the Chalmers Mustard Company got…

  TWELVE

  Faded jeans, a cocoa-brown turtleneck, and a black leather bikers…

  THIRTEEN

  Ten minutes later we were sitting in a Blimpie Base…

  FOURTEEN

  “Here we are,” I said. “The 1950 Chalmers Mustard Ted…

  FIFTEEN

  Once, briefly, there was a Second Avenue subway. Back in…

  SIXTEEN

  I was somewhere, God knows where, picking a lock. Had…

  SEVENTEEN

  “This is an interesting combination,” Carolyn said, inspecting her sandwich.

  EIGHTEEN

  When I went out for lunch with Martin Gilmartin I…

  NINETEEN

  The car slowed. I pressed a button to lower the…

  TWENTY

  He was right. It was a busy week.

  TWENTY-ONE

  At exactly seven-thirty the following evening I presented myself to…

  TWENTY-TWO

  I had a tense moment there, I have to admit…

  TWENTY-THREE

  I had a lunch date the following day, so I…

  TWENTY-FOUR

  A day or two later I was on the phone…

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  PRAISE

  BOOKS BY LAWRENCE BLOCK

  COPYRIGHT

  ABOUT THE PUBLISHER

  CHAPTER

  One

  “Not a bad-looking Burglar,” he said. “I don’t suppose you’d happen to have a decent Alibi?”

  I didn’t hear the italics. They’re present not to indicate vocal stress but to show that they were titles, or at least truncated titles. “A” Is for Alibi and “B” Is for Burglar, those were the books in question, and he had just laid a copy of the latter volume on the counter in front of me, which might have given me a clue. But it didn’t, and I didn’t hear the italics. What I heard was a stocky fellow with a gruff voice calling me a burglar, albeit a not-bad-looking one, and asking if I had an alibi, and I have to tell you it gave me a turn.

  Because I am a burglar, although that’s something I’ve tried to keep from getting around. I’m also a bookseller, in which capacity I was sitting on a stool behind the counter at Barnegat Books. In fact, I’d just about managed to forsake burglary entirely in favor of bookselling, having gone over a year without letting myself into a stranger’s abode. Lately, though, I’d been feeling on the verge of what those earnest folk in twelve-step programs would very likely call a slip.

  Less forgiving souls would call it a premeditated felony.

  Whatever you called it, I was a little sensitive on the subject. I went all cold inside, and then my eyes dropped to the book, and light dawned. “Oh,” I said. “Sue Grafton.”

  “Right. Have you got ‘A’ Is for Alibi?”

  “I don’t believe so. I had a copy of the book-club edition, but—”

  “I’m not interested in book-club editions.”

  “No. Well, even if you were, I couldn’t sell it to you. I don’t have it anymore. Someone bought it.”

  “Why would anyone buy the book-club edition?”

  “Well, the print’s a little larger than the paperback.”

  “So?”

  “Makes it easier to read.”

  The expression on his face told me what he thought of people who bought books for no better reason than to read them. He was in his late thirties, clean-shaven, with a suit and a tie and a full head of glossy brown hair. His mouth was fulllipped and pouty, and he’d have to lose a few pounds if he wanted a jawline.

  “How much?” he demanded.

  I checked the penciled price on the flyleaf. “Eighty dollars. With tax it comes to”—a glance at the tax table—“eighty-six sixty.”

  “I’ll give you a check.”

  “All right.”

  “Or I could give you eighty dollars in cash,” he said, “and we can just forget about the tax.”

  Sometimes this works. Truth to tell, there aren’t many books on my shelves I can’t be persuaded to discount by ten percent or so, even without the incentive of blindsiding the governor. But I told him a check would be fine, and to make it payable to Barnegat Books. When he was done scribbling I looked at the check and read the signature. Borden Stoppelgard, he had written, and that very name was imprinted at the top of his check, along with an address on East Thirty-seventh Street.

  I looked at the signature and I looked at him. “I’ll have to see some identification,” I said.

  Don’t ask me why. I didn’t really think there could be anything wrong with him or his check. The lads who write hot checks don’t offer you cash in an attempt to avoid paying sales tax. I guess I just didn’t like him, and I was trying to be a generic pain in the neck.

  He gave me a look that suggested as much, then hauled out his wallet and came up with a credit card and driver’s license. I verified his signature, jotted down his Amex number on the back of the check, then looked at the picture on the license. It was him, all right, if a touch less jowly. I read the name, Stoppelgard, Borden, and finally the penny dropped.

  “Borden Stoppelgard,” I said.

  “That’s right.”

  “Of Hearthstone Realty.”

  His expression turned guarded. It hadn’t been all that open in the first place, but now it was a fortress, and he was busy digging a moat around it.

  “You’re my landlord,” I said. “You just bought this building.”

  “I own a lot of buildings,” he said. “I buy them, I sell them.”

  “You bought this one, and now you’re looking to raise my rent.”

  “You can hardly deny that it’s ridiculously low.”

  “It’s eight seventy-five a month,” I said. “The lease is up the first of the year, and you’re offering me a new lease at ten thousand five hundred dollars a month.”

  “I imagine that strikes you as high.”

  “High?” I said. “What makes you say that?”

  “Because I can assure you—”

  “Try stratospheric,” I suggested.

  “—that it’s very much in line with the market.”

  “All I know,” I said, “is that it’s completely out of the question. You
want me to pay more each month than I’ve been paying for an entire year. That’s an increase of what, twelve hundred percent? Ten-five a month is more than I gross, for God’s sake.”

  He shrugged. “I guess you’ll have to move.”

  “I don’t want to move,” I said. “I love this store. I bought it from Mr. Litzauer when he decided to retire to Florida, and I want to go on owning it until I retire, and—”

  “Perhaps you should start thinking early retirement.”

  I looked at him.

  “Face it,” he said. “I’m not raising the rent because I’m out to get you. Believe me, it’s nothing personal. Your rent’s been a steal since before you even bought the store. Some idiot gave your buddy Litzauer a thirty-year lease, and the escalators in it didn’t begin to keep pace with the realities of commercial real estate in an inflationary economy. Once I get you out of here I’ll rip out all that shelving and rent the place to a Thai restaurant or a Korean greengrocer, and do you know what kind of rent I’ll get for a nice big space like this? Forget ten-five. Try fifteen a month, fifteen thousand dollars, and the tenant’ll be glad to pay it.”

  “But what am I supposed to do?”

  “Not my problem. But I’m sure there are places in Brooklyn or Queens where you can get this kind of square footage at an affordable rent.”

  “Who goes there to buy books?”

  “Who comes here to buy books? You’re an anachronism, my friend. You’re a throwback to the days when Fourth Avenue was known throughout the world as Booksellers’ Row. Dozens of stores, and what happened to them? The business changed. Paperback books undermined the secondhand market. The general used-book store became a thing of the past, with the owners retiring or dying off. The few who are left are on the tail end of long-term leases like yours, or they’re run by canny old codgers who bought their buildings outright years ago. You’re in a dying business, Mr. Rhodenbarr. Here we are on a beautiful September afternoon and I’m the only customer in your shop. What does that say about your business?”

  “I guess I ought to be selling kiwi fruit,” I said. “Or cold noodles with sesame sauce.”

  “You could probably make this enterprise profitable,” he said. “Throw out ninety-five percent of this junk and specialize in high-ticket collector items. That way you could make do with a tenth the square footage. You could get off the street and run the whole operation out of an upstairs office, or even out of your home. But I don’t want to tell you how to run your business.”

  “You’re already telling me to get out of it.”

  “Am I supposed to support you in a doomed enterprise? I’m not in business for my health.”

  “But,” I said.

  “But what?”

  “But you’re a patron of the arts,” I said. “I saw your name in the Times last week. You donated a painting to a fund-raising auction to benefit the New York Public Library.”

  “My accountant advised it,” he said. “Explained to me how I’ll save more in taxes than I’d have made selling the painting.”

  “Still, you have literary interests. Bookstores like this one are a cultural asset, as important in their own way as the library. You can hardly fail to appreciate that. As a collector—”

  “An investor.”

  I pointed at “B” Is for Burglar. “An investment?”

  “Of course, and a hell of a good one. Women crime writers are a hot item right now. Alibi was less than fifteen dollars when it was published a dozen or so years ago. Do you know what a mint copy with dust jacket will bring now?”

  “Not offhand.”

  “Somewhere around eight-fifty. So I’m buying Grafton, I’m buying Nancy Pickard, I’m buying Linda Barnes. I have a standing order at Murder Ink for every first novel by a female author, because how can you tell who’s going to turn out to be important? Most of them won’t ever amount to much, but this way I don’t have to worry about missing the occasional book that jumps from twenty dollars to a thousand in a few years’ time.”

  “So you’re just interested in investment,” I said.

  “Absolutely. You don’t think I read this crap, do you?”

  I pushed his credit card across the counter, followed it with his drivers license. I picked up his check and tore it in half, then in half again.

  “Get out of here,” I said.

  “What’s the matter with you?”

  “Nothing’s the matter with me,” I said. “I sell books to people who enjoy reading them. It’s anachronistic, I know, but it’s what I do. I also sell them to people who get satisfaction out of collecting rare copies of their favorite authors, and probably to a few visually oriented souls who just like the way good books look on the wall flanking the fireplace. I may even have a few customers who buy with an eye toward investment, although it strikes me as an uncertain way of providing for one’s old age. But I haven’t yet had a customer who was openly contemptuous of what he was buying, and I don’t think I want that kind of customer. I may not be able to pay the rent, Mr. Stoppelgard, but as long as it’s my store I ought to be able to decide whose check I take.”

  “I’ll give you cash.”

  “I don’t want your cash either.”

  I reached for the book, but he snatched it away from me. “No!” he cried. “I found it and I want it. You have to sell it to me.”

  “The hell I do.”

  “You do! I’ll file suit if I have to. But I won’t have to, will I?” He got a hundred-dollar bill out of his wallet, slapped it on the counter. “You can keep the change,” he said. “I’m taking the book. If you try to stop me you’ll find yourself charged with assault.”

  “Oh, for God’s sake,” I said. “I’m not going to fight you for it. Hold on a second and I’ll get you your change.”

  “I told you to keep it. What do I care about the change? I just bought a five-hundred-dollar book for a hundred dollars. You damned fool, you don’t even know how to price your own stock. No wonder you can’t afford the rent.”

  CHAPTER

  Two

  “According to Oscar Wilde,” I told Carolyn, “a cynic is a man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. I’d say that fits Borden Stoppelgard well enough. He doesn’t even read the books but he knows what they’re worth. I called a couple of the mystery bookstores, and the son of a bitch is right about the prices. ‘A’ Is for Alibi has been bringing close to a thousand in decent shape. And my copy of Burglar was a five-hundred-dollar book.”

  “I have both of them.”

  “Really?”

  “In paperback.”

  “In paperback they’re worth something like a buck apiece.”

  “That’s okay, Bern. I wasn’t planning on selling them anyway. I have all the early books in paperback. I didn’t start buying Sue Grafton in hardcover until the book about the photographer who took blackmail shots of the school principal and the nun. I forget the title.”

  “‘F’ Is for Stop.”

  “Yeah, that’s the one. I think it’s the first book of hers I ever picked up in hardcover. Or was it the one about the exploitative sex therapist?”

  “‘G’ Is for Spot?”

  “Great book. I know I’ve got that one in hardcover, and I think I’ve got the F one, too, but I didn’t buy them for investment. I just didn’t want to wait a year for them to come out in paperback. Bern? Do you suppose she’s gay?”

  “Sue Grafton? Gee, I don’t think so. Isn’t she married?”

  She shook her head, impatient. “Not Sue Grafton,” she said. “I’m positive she’s straight. Didn’t I tell you I met her at a signing last spring at Foul Play? Her husband was there, too. Real muscular guy, he looked like he could bench-press a Pontiac. No, I would say she’s definitely straight.”

  “That’s what I thought.”

  “No lesbian vibes at all. Hundred percent heterosexual, that’s my take on the woman.” She sighed. “What a waste.”

  “Well, if she’s straight—”
/>   “Definitely, Bern. No question.”

  “Then who were you wondering about?”

  “Kinsey.”

  “Kinsey?”

  “Kinsey Millhone.”

  “Kinsey Millhone?”

  “What are you, an echo? Yeah, Kinsey Millhone. What’s the matter with you, Bernie? Kinsey Millhone, leading private detective of Santa Teresa, California. Jesus, Bern, don’t you read the books?”

  “Of course I read the books. You think Kinsey’s gay?”

  “I think there’s a good possibility.”

  “She’s divorced,” I said, “and she’s involved with men from time to time, and—”

  “Camouflage, Bern. I mean, look at the evidence, okay? She doesn’t care about makeup, she’s got this one all-purpose dress that she’s still wearing ten books into the series, she’s tough-minded, she’s hard-boiled, she’s sensible, she’s logical—”

  “Must be a lesbian.”

  “My point exactly. God, look at the men she gets involved with, like that shmendrick of a cop. Pure camouflage.” She shrugged. “Now, I can certainly understand why she’d be in the closet. She’d lose a lot of readers otherwise. But who knows what she gets mixed up in between books?”

  “Did you ask Sue Grafton?”

  “Are you kidding? I could barely bring myself to speak. The last thing I was gonna do was ask her what Kinsey liked to do in bed. She signed her book for me, Bern. In fact, she inscribed it to me personally.”

  “That’s great.”

  “Isn’t it? I said, ‘Miss Grafton, my name’s Carolyn, I’m a real Kinsey Millhone fan.’ And she inscribed it, ‘To Carolyn, a real Kinsey Millhone fan.’ ”

  “That’s pretty imaginative.”

  “I’ll say. Well, the woman’s a writer, Bern. Anyway, I’ve got a signed copy of one of her books, but I don’t suppose it’ll ever be worth a thousand dollars, because there must be a ton of them. The line that day reached all the way to the corner. It’s the book about the doctor. Have you read it yet?”

  “Not yet.”

  “Well, you can’t borrow my copy, because it’s autographed. You’ll have to wait for the paperback. Since you haven’t read it I won’t say anything about the murder method, but I have to tell you it’s a shocker. The guy’s a proctologist, if that gives you a hint. Why can’t I ever remember the titles?”

 

    Tanner on Ice Read onlineTanner on IceHit Me Read onlineHit MeHit and Run Read onlineHit and RunHope to Die Read onlineHope to DieTwo For Tanner Read onlineTwo For TannerTanners Virgin Read onlineTanners VirginDead Girl Blues Read onlineDead Girl BluesOne Night Stands and Lost Weekends Read onlineOne Night Stands and Lost WeekendsA Drop of the Hard Stuff Read onlineA Drop of the Hard StuffThe Canceled Czech Read onlineThe Canceled CzechEven the Wicked Read onlineEven the WickedMe Tanner, You Jane Read onlineMe Tanner, You JaneQuotidian Keller Read onlineQuotidian KellerSmall Town Read onlineSmall TownTanners Tiger Read onlineTanners TigerA Walk Among the Tombstones Read onlineA Walk Among the TombstonesTanners Twelve Swingers Read onlineTanners Twelve SwingersGym Rat & the Murder Club Read onlineGym Rat & the Murder ClubEverybody Dies Read onlineEverybody DiesThe Thief Who Couldnt Sleep Read onlineThe Thief Who Couldnt SleepHit Parade Read onlineHit ParadeThe Devil Knows Youre Dead Read onlineThe Devil Knows Youre DeadThe Burglar in Short Order Read onlineThe Burglar in Short OrderA Long Line of Dead Men Read onlineA Long Line of Dead MenKeller's Homecoming Read onlineKeller's HomecomingResume Speed Read onlineResume SpeedKeller's Adjustment Read onlineKeller's AdjustmentEight Million Ways to Die Read onlineEight Million Ways to DieTime to Murder and Create Read onlineTime to Murder and CreateOut on the Cutting Edge Read onlineOut on the Cutting EdgeA Dance at the Slaughter House Read onlineA Dance at the Slaughter HouseIn the Midst of Death Read onlineIn the Midst of DeathWhen the Sacred Ginmill Closes Read onlineWhen the Sacred Ginmill ClosesYou Could Call It Murder Read onlineYou Could Call It MurderKeller on the Spot Read onlineKeller on the SpotA Ticket to the Boneyard Read onlineA Ticket to the BoneyardA Time to Scatter Stones Read onlineA Time to Scatter StonesKeller's Designated Hitter Read onlineKeller's Designated HitterA Stab in the Dark Read onlineA Stab in the DarkSins of the Fathers Read onlineSins of the FathersThe Burglar in the Closet Read onlineThe Burglar in the ClosetBurglar Who Dropped In On Elvis Read onlineBurglar Who Dropped In On ElvisThe Burglar Who Painted Like Mondrian Read onlineThe Burglar Who Painted Like MondrianThe Girl With the Long Green Heart Read onlineThe Girl With the Long Green HeartThe Burglar Who Counted the Spoons (Bernie Rhodenbarr) Read onlineThe Burglar Who Counted the Spoons (Bernie Rhodenbarr)Burglar Who Smelled Smoke Read onlineBurglar Who Smelled SmokeRude Awakening (Kit Tolliver #2) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineRude Awakening (Kit Tolliver #2) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)Don't Get in the Car (Kit Tolliver #9) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineDon't Get in the Car (Kit Tolliver #9) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)CH04 - The Topless Tulip Caper Read onlineCH04 - The Topless Tulip CaperYou Can Call Me Lucky (Kit Tolliver #3) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineYou Can Call Me Lucky (Kit Tolliver #3) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)CH02 - Chip Harrison Scores Again Read onlineCH02 - Chip Harrison Scores AgainStrangers on a Handball Court Read onlineStrangers on a Handball CourtCleveland in My Dreams Read onlineCleveland in My DreamsClean Slate (Kit Tolliver #4) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineClean Slate (Kit Tolliver #4) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)The Burglar Who Traded Ted Williams Read onlineThe Burglar Who Traded Ted WilliamsBurglar on the Prowl Read onlineBurglar on the ProwlIn For a Penny (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineIn For a Penny (A Story From the Dark Side)Catch and Release Paperback Read onlineCatch and Release PaperbackRide A White Horse Read onlineRide A White HorseNo Score Read onlineNo ScoreLooking for David (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 7) Read onlineLooking for David (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 7)Jilling (Kit Tolliver #6) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineJilling (Kit Tolliver #6) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)Ariel Read onlineArielEnough Rope Read onlineEnough RopeGrifter's Game Read onlineGrifter's GameCanceled Czech Read onlineCanceled CzechUnfinished Business (Kit Tolliver #12) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineUnfinished Business (Kit Tolliver #12) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)Thirty Read onlineThirtyThe Burglar Who Thought He Was Bogart Read onlineThe Burglar Who Thought He Was BogartMake Out with Murder Read onlineMake Out with MurderOne Last Night at Grogan's (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 11) Read onlineOne Last Night at Grogan's (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 11)The Burglar on the Prowl Read onlineThe Burglar on the ProwlWelcome to the Real World (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineWelcome to the Real World (A Story From the Dark Side)Keller 05 - Hit Me Read onlineKeller 05 - Hit MeWalk Among the Tombstones: A Matthew Scudder Crime Novel Read onlineWalk Among the Tombstones: A Matthew Scudder Crime NovelRonald Rabbit Is a Dirty Old Man Read onlineRonald Rabbit Is a Dirty Old ManThe Burglar Who Studied Spinoza Read onlineThe Burglar Who Studied SpinozaThe Burglar Who Liked to Quote Kipling Read onlineThe Burglar Who Liked to Quote KiplingKeller in Des Moines Read onlineKeller in Des MoinesHit List Read onlineHit ListThe Dettweiler Solution Read onlineThe Dettweiler SolutionHCC 115 - Borderline Read onlineHCC 115 - BorderlineA Drop of the Hard Stuff: A Matthew Scudder Novel Read onlineA Drop of the Hard Stuff: A Matthew Scudder NovelStep by Step Read onlineStep by StepThe Girl With the Deep Blue Eyes Read onlineThe Girl With the Deep Blue EyesIf You Can't Stand the Heat (Kit Tolliver #1) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineIf You Can't Stand the Heat (Kit Tolliver #1) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)The Topless Tulip Caper Read onlineThe Topless Tulip CaperDolly's Trash & Treasures (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineDolly's Trash & Treasures (A Story From the Dark Side)The Triumph of Evil Read onlineThe Triumph of EvilFun with Brady and Angelica (Kit Tolliver #10 (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineFun with Brady and Angelica (Kit Tolliver #10 (The Kit Tolliver Stories)Burglars Can't Be Choosers Read onlineBurglars Can't Be ChoosersWho Knows Where It Goes (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineWho Knows Where It Goes (A Story From the Dark Side)Deadly Honeymoon Read onlineDeadly HoneymoonLike a Bone in the Throat (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineLike a Bone in the Throat (A Story From the Dark Side)A Chance to Get Even (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineA Chance to Get Even (A Story From the Dark Side)The Boy Who Disappeared Clouds Read onlineThe Boy Who Disappeared CloudsCollecting Ackermans Read onlineCollecting AckermansWaitress Wanted (Kit Tolliver #5) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineWaitress Wanted (Kit Tolliver #5) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)One Thousand Dollars a Word Read onlineOne Thousand Dollars a WordEven the Wicked: A Matthew Scudder Novel (Matthew Scudder Mysteries) Read onlineEven the Wicked: A Matthew Scudder Novel (Matthew Scudder Mysteries)Hit Man Read onlineHit ManThe Night and The Music Read onlineThe Night and The MusicEhrengraf for the Defense Read onlineEhrengraf for the DefenseThe Merciful Angel of Death (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 5) Read onlineThe Merciful Angel of Death (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 5)The Burglar in the Rye Read onlineThe Burglar in the RyeI Know How to Pick 'Em Read onlineI Know How to Pick 'EmGetting Off hcc-69 Read onlineGetting Off hcc-69Three in the Side Pocket (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineThree in the Side Pocket (A Story From the Dark Side)Let's Get Lost (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 8) Read onlineLet's Get Lost (A Matthew Scudder Story Book 8)Strange Are the Ways of Love Read onlineStrange Are the Ways of LoveMOSTLY MURDER: Till Death: a mystery anthology Read onlineMOSTLY MURDER: Till Death: a mystery anthologyMasters of Noir: Volume Four Read onlineMasters of Noir: Volume FourA Week as Andrea Benstock Read onlineA Week as Andrea BenstockScenarios (A Stoiry From the Dark Side) Read onlineScenarios (A Stoiry From the Dark Side)The Sex Therapists: What They Can Do and How They Do It (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 15) Read onlineThe Sex Therapists: What They Can Do and How They Do It (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 15)Like a Thief in the Night: a Bernie Rhodenbarr story Read onlineLike a Thief in the Night: a Bernie Rhodenbarr storyA Diet of Treacle Read onlineA Diet of TreacleCommunity of Women Read onlineCommunity of WomenDifferent Strokes: How I (Gulp!) Wrote, Directed, and Starred in an X-rated Movie (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineDifferent Strokes: How I (Gulp!) Wrote, Directed, and Starred in an X-rated Movie (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)You Don't Even Feel It (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineYou Don't Even Feel It (A Story From the Dark Side)Zeroing In (Kit Tolliver #11) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineZeroing In (Kit Tolliver #11) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)The Wife-Swap Report (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineThe Wife-Swap Report (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)Keller's Fedora (Kindle Single) Read onlineKeller's Fedora (Kindle Single)Speaking of Lust Read onlineSpeaking of LustEverybody Dies (Matthew Scudder) Read onlineEverybody Dies (Matthew Scudder)Defender of the Innocent: The Casebook of Martin Ehrengraf Read onlineDefender of the Innocent: The Casebook of Martin EhrengrafAfter the First Death Read onlineAfter the First DeathWriting the Novel Read onlineWriting the NovelHow Far - a one-act stage play Read onlineHow Far - a one-act stage playChip Harrison Scores Again Read onlineChip Harrison Scores AgainThe Topless Tulip Caper ch-4 Read onlineThe Topless Tulip Caper ch-4The Crime of Our Lives Read onlineThe Crime of Our LivesKilling Castro Read onlineKilling CastroThe Trouble with Eden Read onlineThe Trouble with EdenNothing Short of Highway Robbery Read onlineNothing Short of Highway RobberySin Hellcat Read onlineSin HellcatGetting Off: A Novel of Sex & Violence (Hard Case Crime) Read onlineGetting Off: A Novel of Sex & Violence (Hard Case Crime)Coward's Kiss Read onlineCoward's KissAlive in Shape and Color Read onlineAlive in Shape and ColorBlow for Freedom Read onlineBlow for FreedomThe New Sexual Underground: Crossing the Last Boundaries (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 10) Read onlineThe New Sexual Underground: Crossing the Last Boundaries (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 10)April North Read onlineApril NorthLucky at Cards Read onlineLucky at CardsOne Night Stands; Lost weekends Read onlineOne Night Stands; Lost weekendsSweet Little Hands (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineSweet Little Hands (A Story From the Dark Side)Blood on Their Hands Read onlineBlood on Their HandsA Dance at the Slaughterhouse Read onlineA Dance at the SlaughterhouseHeadaches and Bad Dreams (A Story From the Dark Side) Read onlineHeadaches and Bad Dreams (A Story From the Dark Side)Keller's Therapy Read onlineKeller's TherapyThe Specialists Read onlineThe SpecialistsHit and Run jk-4 Read onlineHit and Run jk-4Threesome Read onlineThreesomeLove at a Tender Age (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineLove at a Tender Age (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)The Devil Knows You're Dead: A MATTHEW SCUDDER CRIME NOVEL Read onlineThe Devil Knows You're Dead: A MATTHEW SCUDDER CRIME NOVELFunny You Should Ask Read onlineFunny You Should AskCH01 - No Score Read onlineCH01 - No ScoreSex and the Stewardess (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineSex and the Stewardess (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)A Madwoman's Diary Read onlineA Madwoman's DiaryWhen This Man Dies Read onlineWhen This Man DiesSinner Man Read onlineSinner ManSuch Men Are Dangerous Read onlineSuch Men Are DangerousA Strange Kind of Love Read onlineA Strange Kind of LoveEnough of Sorrow Read onlineEnough of Sorrow69 Barrow Street Read online69 Barrow StreetA Moment of Wrong Thinking (Matthew Scudder Mysteries Series Book 9) Read onlineA Moment of Wrong Thinking (Matthew Scudder Mysteries Series Book 9)Eight Million Ways to Die ms-5 Read onlineEight Million Ways to Die ms-5Warm and Willing Read onlineWarm and WillingMona Read onlineMonaIn Sunlight or In Shadow Read onlineIn Sunlight or In ShadowA Candle for the Bag Lady (Matthew Scudder Book 2) Read onlineA Candle for the Bag Lady (Matthew Scudder Book 2)Conjugal Rites (Kit Tolliver #7) (The Kit Tolliver Stories) Read onlineConjugal Rites (Kit Tolliver #7) (The Kit Tolliver Stories)Speaking of Lust - the novella Read onlineSpeaking of Lust - the novellaGigolo Johnny Wells Read onlineGigolo Johnny WellsDark City Lights Read onlineDark City LightsVersatile Ladies: the bisexual option (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineVersatile Ladies: the bisexual option (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)Passport to Peril Read onlinePassport to PerilThe Taboo Breakers: Shock Troops of the Sexual Revolution (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineThe Taboo Breakers: Shock Troops of the Sexual Revolution (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)Lucky at Cards hcc-28 Read onlineLucky at Cards hcc-28Campus Tramp Read onlineCampus Tramp3 is Not a Crowd (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read online3 is Not a Crowd (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)Manhattan Noir Read onlineManhattan NoirThe Burglar in the Library Read onlineThe Burglar in the LibraryDoing It! - Going Beyond the Sexual Revolution (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 13) Read onlineDoing It! - Going Beyond the Sexual Revolution (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior Book 13)So Willing Read onlineSo WillingThe Burglar Who Traded Ted Williams br-6 Read onlineThe Burglar Who Traded Ted Williams br-6Candy Read onlineCandySex Without Strings: A Handbook for Consenting Adults (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior) Read onlineSex Without Strings: A Handbook for Consenting Adults (John Warren Wells on Sexual Behavior)The Devil Knows You're Dead: A MATTHEW SCUDDER CRIME NOVEL (Matthew Scudder Mysteries) Read onlineThe Devil Knows You're Dead: A MATTHEW SCUDDER CRIME NOVEL (Matthew Scudder Mysteries)Manhattan Noir 2 Read onlineManhattan Noir 2The Scoreless Thai (aka Two For Tanner) Read onlineThe Scoreless Thai (aka Two For Tanner)